Cat Ipsum


Get scared by sudden appearance of cucumber. Plays league of legends cat snacks. Put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at full speed stand in doorway, unwilling to chose whether to stay in or go out, but leave buried treasure in the sandbox for the toddlers reaches under door into adjacent room stare out the window, demand to have some of whatever the human is cooking, then sniff the offering and walk away. Paw your face to wake you up in the morning eat owner's food so pee in the shoe hate dog purr yet headbutt owner's knee so sit in a box for hours. Kitty poochy cats go for world domination but ignore the squirrels, you'll never catch them anyway. Purr. Taco cat backwards spells taco cat. Sit on human cuddle no cuddle cuddle love scratch scratch meow for food, then when human fills food dish, take a few bites of food and continue meowing. Leave dead animals as gifts trip on catnip yet the door is opening! how exciting oh, it's you, meh push your water glass on the floor. Run at 3am. Cough furball into food bowl then scratch owner for a new one sniff sniff, or catasstrophe i like to spend my days sleeping and eating fishes that my human fished for me we live on a luxurious yacht, sailing proudly under the sun, i like to walk on the deck, watching the horizon, dreaming of a good bowl of milk, and cat slap dog in face, and meow in empty rooms. As lick i the shoes headbutt owner's knee why must they do that. Open the door, let me out, let me out, let me-out, let me-aow, let meaow, meaow! munch on tasty moths sit by the fire meow for swipe at owner's legs. Behind the couch fight own tail for i’m so hungry i’m so hungry but ew not for that yet lick master's hand at first then bite because im moody yet sit on the laptop. Gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention just kidding i don't want it anymore meow bye white cat sleeps on a black shirt, shred all toilet paper and spread around the house and under the bed kitty power making bread on the bathrobe. If human is on laptop sit on the keyboard behind the couch. I will ruin the couch with my claws while happily ignoring when being called so thug cat or jump around on couch, meow constantly until given food, nya nya nyan eat a plant, kill a hand. Rub butt on table pretend not to be evil cough hairball on conveniently placed pants meow stretch, or i heard this rumor where the humans are our owners, pfft, what do they know?! a nice warm laptop for me to sit on. Dismember a mouse and then regurgitate parts of it on the family room floor meow meow we are 3 small kittens sleeping most of our time, we are around 15 weeks old i think, i don’t know i can’t count, and push your water glass on the floor. Wake up human for food at 4am lick yarn hanging out of own butt. Flee in terror at cucumber discovered on floor poop on couch yet gnaw the corn cob ooooh feather moving feather! so jump off balcony, onto stranger's head but meoooow so stare at the wall, play with food and get confused by dust. Purr as loud as possible, be the most annoying cat that you can, and, knock everything off the table. Play riveting piece on synthesizer keyboard attack like a vicious monster and mewl for food at 4am. Why use post when this sofa is here missing until dinner time why use post when this sofa is here.